Venus And Men Term paper

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Mars And Venus

I am following up on the book of , “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.” by

John Gray. “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” was been a very interesting

book. The book brought up some very interesting facts about both sexes. While also

remaining very general to cover basically everyone and simple for everyone to understand.

So simple in fact that I saw everything in there as being common sense; but also at the same

time being hidden from the obvious senses.

In the past the news has done interviews with John Gray and his recent students. It has

basically shown that whoever who has gone to John Gray for advice in a troubled

relationship has came out as basically a new couple. I find it hard to believe for one man to

have all the answers. Also why is he seems to be the only one with the answers? Why are

all the other men in the dark about women? Why are so many women in the dark about

men?

Now I will look into the book to see just what makes John Gray so good in the field of

opposite sexes. I am just going to sum up the points in the book. Right off the bat Gray

states that we men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. Gray states out the

tendencies Martians tend to have. Also he states out how the Venusians are like in their time

in Venus. But the interesting part is he states out these qualities by giving the two different

stories of origins. Gray lets us know that “Martians” and Venusians are of two different

species. And that to start loving one another we have to except these differences and learn

more about the other race.

One difference is Martians and Venusians speak different languages. “The Martians and

Venusians languages had the same words, but the way they were used gave different

meanings.” (pg. 59) Miscommunication. John Gray shows a very obvious point of why

men and women sometimes have such hard times getting along to each other. We men tend

to take things too literally and anything else we take as an attack against us. Women tend to

say sentences which have deeper meanings. Some of the phrases men easily misinterpreted

are: “We never go out.”, “You don’t love me anymore.”, or “The house is always a mess.”.

And for these phrases we have some dumb response like, “ We just went out last week.”. In

telling people that both sexes speak two different languages I can see how Gray is helping

couples out. Gray is in fact in encouraging people to be more sensitive to their mates and to

be very communicative. Also to try to be more understanding of their partners when there is

something troubling him/her. I say Gray gets one point for bringing up such a good point.

Onto another point I award to John Gray. John distinguishes Martians and Venusians

have very different cultures. There are things in which guys do that the does not interest the

female and vise versa. I agree with John on the point that men usually like to solve their

own problems. It makes a male feel needed and useful. Women on the other hand like to

talk out their problems. They don’t actually need people to help solve their problems; but

people to hear them out. In one of the sections John said that guys are generally “Mr.

Fix-its”. With this pointed out to me by John Gray I can now see why fights break out.

When a women has a problem she would probably go to her mate to hear her out. Being the

“Mr. Fix-its” we are we try to solve her problem right away by disrupting her with advice.

So in time the natural phrase from the Venusian is, “You don’t listen to me.” Of course the

male just thought that he was paying attention and helping her out. But with this line the

Martian is probably on the defensive end now because the Venusian now made an attack on

him. And a big mess could get started. Understand this concept the Martian has got to learn

on how to just sit, listen, and support his Venusian counterpart.

On the other hand John also tries to explain to the Venusians that Martians need their

space. Martians can not be forced to love according to John Gray. “Men are like rubber

bands.” I am not sure about this theory of Gray’s. I have not seen anybody feel that way

yet. But it is probable true. According to John the more you try to love your Martian and

the more you try to make your Martian love you the more you push your Martian away.

But if you let your Martian move about by himself then like a rubber band he will naturally

come back to you. I know I need my space but I have yet to experience finding it hard to

love back if she is really close to me. But I think John’s rubber band theory implies the

feeling of over commitment of some men. I think when a Venusian starts to hint to the

Martian about their future together is forced love. If it is so I can see why a Martian would

want to back away. Marriage is a big step. Or if the Venusian is trying to take time away

from Martian bonding I can also see why the...

Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus
John Gray, Ph.D.
HarperCollins Publishers, Inc,., 10 East 53rd Street, New York, NY 10022 You should cite this paper as follows:

MLA Style
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